You can thank M. Night Shyamalan for this

He's Just Not That Into You

2009-08-11T20:44:00.003-06:00

I really should have named this post: I'm Just Not That Into How This Book Was Adapted to Film.

After a conversation over amazing French food and wine with one of my girl friends from high school, I finally watched He's Just Not That Into You. Almost every woman I know had seen this movie and all told me pretty much the same thing: that they related to parts of it and that it had a good message.

Before I get into what I want to say about the movie, let me begin by saying what I want to about the book. I was a junior/senior in college when the book was first published, and as a communication and rhetoric major it was a huge discussion point. I read and studied the book quite a bit for academic purposes and I was so curious as to how the message that is written in the book could be transformed into a movie. Let me rephrase that. I was curious as to how it could be transformed into a movie that people would actually like. The book... is pretty harsh.

Then there's the movie. It's got that Love Actually kind of feel to it where there's multiple plot lines going on with lots of different people who all kind of know each other somehow. That's fine. Whatever.

Justin Long's character is the only character in the movie who is consistent with the message of the HJNTIY book. That message is that women cling on to men too easily and don't move on when the guy isn't interested. The message of the book is that if the guy isn't calling you, he doesn't want you, so move the F on with your life. Except it's a little bit more abrasive than that.

At the beginning of the movie, Justin Long's character portrays this message. And it's good! I think it is something that a lot of women need to hear. He tells the cute girl in the movie whose name I don't know that she IS NOT the exception how men are going to treat her, she is the RULE. But what happens at the end of the movie? Oh yeah... she becomes the freaking exception by hooking up with a guy who previously had no interest in her!

Oh and also, Jennifer Aniston's character is supposed to teach us that not all men want to get married and if they are going to waste your time and life you should dump them. This is a great message until she gets back together with her dreamy boyfriend and, so conveniently, he changes his mind about marriage and proposes.

He's Just Not That Into You the book was written because women have always been led to believe (by movies and by each other) that men know not what they do and in the end, love prevails. It was written to help women realize that some relationships aren't meant to be and to move on.

He's Just Not That Into You the movie does nothing more than reinforce this myth and acts just like those movies that fill women's heads with the idea that they will be the "exception" and not the "rule."

It really gets my goat when a perfectly good text is mangled to fit the proper "Hollywood Ending." Though I'm sure no one would have paid $10 to go see a movie where all the women end up single, unhappy, and alone because He's Just Not That Into Them.

The Fugitive

2009-06-03T20:42:00.003-06:00

I haven't seen any new movies lately. However, I did watch The Fugitive on TV over the weekend, for probably about the 20th time, and learned the following:

1. Once upon a time, Harrison Ford was kind of dreamy. When The Fugitive first came out, I was maybe 9 years old and thought Harrison Ford looked like my grandpa. That, my friends, is no longer the case. That is one fugitive I would harbor any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

2. It is still a badass movie. I attribute this to Tommy Lee Jones being the eternal badass.

3. The plot of The Fugitive is a lot more intricate than I ever remembered it being. Pharmaceutical companies? Liver samples being switched? Wha?? But, this also goes back to me being about 9 years old when the movie first came out.

4. What I enjoy most about this movie is that, unlike most movies with similar plot themes, The Fugitive doesn't have ridiculous shoot-out scenes with mayhem and violence and all that brouhaha. Ok, there is a little bit at the end, but it all relates to the plot. I feel like most movies of this genre just have a ton of gratuitous violence, which is fine and all, but it's not realistic. In real life, if one cop fires one shot, he/she gets put on administrative leave until an investigation is completed to determine whether or not said shot should have been fired. I know movies are fictional and all, but come on, throw me a realistic bone every once in a while.

5. There are some movies I will just never, ever get sick of. This is probably one of them.

I need to get my ass to the movie theater to see some new movies. Sometimes, watching old movies on TV is great. Other times, it's The Notebook all weekend long and that's just bad news all around.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

2009-05-03T10:02:00.003-06:00

If you are one of the five people who have actually read my senior thesis about Fight Club, you know that I am a sucker for movies that embellish and satirize the daily life of your average Jack. (After living in a military town for three years, I try to avoid the word "Joe" as much as possible). I prefer movies that do this because I walk away from it feeling like the crappy things that happen in my life may be crappy, but they can be funny, too. This is why I don't like sci-fi movies. Unless one day I end up trying to save the world from zombies and/or aliens, I don't think I will ever relate to a sci-fi movie. If I can't find something real in a movie, I probably won't like it.

So, about a year ago, I heard about this movie called Forgetting Sarah Marshall. My friend Randy (sometimes also known as Tito Taquito), told me that I had to see it. He said that it was really funny, but different than most other comedies. So, that night I rented the movie and immediately saw what everyone was talking about.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall is a movie about an average guy named Peter who gets dumped by his TV star girlfriend, the aforementioned Sarah Marshall. He has such a hard time getting over her, he takes a vacation to Hawaii to find that she is also there with her new boyfriend, a snarky Englishman played by Russell Brand. You can guess where the plot goes from here. Hilarity does ensue, but what makes this movie so hilarious is the way it satirizes and exaggerates the things that happen to us "normal" people when we are dumped.

Though most of us have never dated a TV star, we have all had our Sarah Marshalls. You know, the kind of relationship where you are so out of your league and in love with someone that you fail to realize they are unhappy, possibly miserable, and most likely cheating on you. Then when you figure it out and you get dumped (or whichever comes first), you are so desperately devastated that you can’t think straight. Everywhere you go, you are reminded of your Sarah Marshall and you can’t escape the memories. You feel like your life is over, that no one will fill the void of your Sarah Marshall. We’ve all been there.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall is an honest and funny film that demonstrates the emotions and behavior that average people experience after heartbreak – the bad dates, the intrusive family members, the fraught need to move on but being derailed many times in the process.

But, of course, this movie has a happy ending. Don’t most of them? It annoys me sometimes, because life doesn’t always have a happy ending. But I will give this movie a reprieve because I think it makes a very good point. Yes, your Sarah Marshall may have broken your heart, and things might feel hopeless for a while, but in the end you will forget her. Or in my case, him.

Inspired by a True Story

2009-04-14T15:29:00.002-06:00

This is one story that should never be turned into a movie.

Ten years ago when the Columbine shooting happened, I was a freshman in high school. I had many friends who went to the school and I visited there often for various school activities and sports. I can’t explain the day it happened. I have never really been able to put it into words. There is no reason for me to keep trying – it won’t change the turmoil of that day or the months following.

When this tragedy first happened, it was painted as a picture of two loaners who sought revenge. The media told us of two boys who were so tormented by the jock culture at Columbine, that they created an elaborate plan to seek out and kill anyone and everyone who had crossed them.

The media interviewed students who had just fled for their life out of the school, who were already telling non-fact checked stories of what had happened inside. Some students were even saying the killers’ names on live TV before the shooting was over. The first headline on the Rocky Mountain News after the shooting read that 25 individuals had been killed. In reality, the death toll would end at 15. Mere hours after the first shots were fired, the media told us a story of a young martyr inside the Columbine library who was shot after telling one of the killers she believed in God. We would later find out this story was false.

Living only 10 minutes away from the school made it difficult to miss anything that was being said or reported about the shooting. I was 15, involved in a huge emotional crisis because of my connection to this tragedy, and the news coverage became all-encompassing.

This event was so sudden and so horrendous it created a sense of panic everywhere. Much of the shooting was aired on live television. I sat in a classroom watching a Columbine student named Patrick Ireland dangling from a window as he attempted to escape the library. The media was completely unprepared for this tragedy that would unfold before our eyes. For most involved, I think it would have been better for the cameras to have been turned off while this irreparable catastrophe unfolded.

Even though the victims and their families were being completely exploited by the media chomping at the bit for live breaking news, the community came together quickly in support of the victims. My parents attempted to donate blood hours after the shooting, and were turned away because so many people from the community had filled the blood banks to ensure that every victim would receive the necessary treatment. This outstanding effort from the community – something real - was juxtaposed with the media reporting fabrications of events that happened leading up to, during, and after the shooting.

The adrenaline of this tragedy took over the nation. Everything from Marilyn Manson to Mortal Kombat was scapegoated as the real perpetrator behind the shooting. Not Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold. While the media debated if The Matrix was to blame for this horrible tragedy, members of the Littleton community were attending memorial services and building crosses in memory of the victims. The media was taking advantage of this awful event to avenge popular culture and create fodder for every news outlet in America.

Ten years later it is apparent that most of what was reported not only the day of the shooting, but the couple of years after, was erroneous. The shooters were upgraded from anguished loaners to deranged psychopaths. Which was the truth that most of us here already knew. The word of mouth stories from inside the school the day of the shooting were mostly dissolved as hearsay. The beautiful story that the media had written was diminishing into something much less romantic – just your typical run-of-the-mill massacre planned by two disturbed teenagers who had everyone fooled.

Obviously, the media (especially the local media here in Denver), has not made an effort to dispel these rumors that still float around. I was impressed today when I read an article on usatoday.com that echoed this truth. I’m sure that there will never be a huge endeavor on the media’s end to set the story straight. Why would they? The other story they painted was so much more fun and relevant to popular culture.

It’s been ten years and it still doesn’t seem real to me. Partly because the real story has never been told in its entirety.

I’d be surprised if this appalling story ever makes its way into the movie theater as a “based on a true story” film. From what I can tell, the story that every news outlet has ever told about Columbine is the biggest work of fiction that could be created from this event. Even Hollywood couldn’t match it.

The Holiday

2009-03-25T16:05:00.004-06:00

Lately TBS has been showing The Holiday a lot. Every time it’s on, I watch it. I have a problem with watching movies that I’ve seen over and over again. Perhaps I do it because every time I watch a movie, I take something different away from it. No matter what the reason is, it doesn’t change the fact that I have watched The Holiday about three times in the past few days, causing me to have *false* Jude Law sightings around town.

Alright, let’s get it out of the way: this movie is a chick flick. But it is not one of the typical “ohmighod I am a single woman and like, SO unhappy, even though I am outwardly stubborn, yet fiercely successful, and all I need is a man to fix my life!” kinds of movie. Though, I suppose at its most basic outline, it is that type of film. I like that the plot takes a different journey to this message than most chick flicks tend to do.

Kate Winslet’s character, Iris, is the film’s most “real” character, that movie watchers are most likely to empathize with. She is in love with a man named Jasper who has kept her on the back burner for three years. He gets engaged to a co-worker, which he conveniently forgets to tell Iris until it is announced at the company Christmas party. Douchebag.

Iris is vulnerable and sweet. Even if you are not this type of person, her character will make you remember the saddest emotions you’ve ever had in the unrequited love department, whether you were outward with these emotions or not. Iris is a character that many women and men can commiserate with, as most of us have been at the mercy of someone stringing us along. The most true and poignant line in this entire movie is said by Iris to Jack Black’s character, Miles, as he is also being strung along by an undeserving lover, Maggie. Miles questions why he never learns that Maggie is bad for him, always giving her a second chance. Iris states:

“Because you're hoping you're wrong. And every time she does something that tells you she's no good, you ignore it. And every time she comes through and surprises you, she wins you over, and you lose that argument with yourself, that she's not for you.”

Bingo. I can’t count how many times I have tried to say these same words to my friends, and to myself, but couldn’t quite piece the logic together. This is the answer to every guy who asks “Why do girls always date assholes?” There’s your answer! Thank you to whomever the broken-hearted and jaded member of the screenplay writing team was who threw that gem into the script! You rocked my otherwise unrockable world!

The other part of this film is the storyline that occurs between Cameron Diaz (Amanda) and Jude Law (Graham). This is the real chick-flicky part of the film, though I still don’t mind it too much. Amanda is a movie trailer editor, and this detail creates a unique self-deprecating aspect of the film making fun of how commercialized films have become.

This film theme is carried out in the enchanting sub-plot of The Holiday, which is about an old man named Arthur, who, in his younger days, used to be a big-time Hollywood screenwriter. His endearing character and relationship with Iris is what helps this film rise above being an emblematic chick flick. Arthur teaches Iris that she should be the “leading lady in her own life.” His character, whether intentional or not, reminds us of the important role that movies used to play in culture. He admits that movies aren’t as special as they used to be, which of course, makes you want to embrace this movie more because of the cute old man telling you to. In the end, everyone falls in love, Jasper gets his, and the British accents get kind of annoying.

Maybe the next time I have an emotional crisis, I will traipse over to England to see if Jude Law is waiting for me. Who am I kidding? We all know I’d get stuck with Jack Black, doomed to a life of watching movies over and over again on TBS.

Gran Torino

2009-03-21T11:37:00.002-06:00

I have been fortunate to live in an era, a region, and a culture where racial tension has not been something that I have witnessed. I went to a high school known as "White Ridge," after all. It is always interesting for me to watch movies that have race as a theme because it is not something I have ever experienced first-hand. As I watch the film, I wonder if the way racial tension is being portrayed in the movie is better or worse than what happens, or has happened, in "real life." These types of films always make me really uncomfortable and anxious. The worst was watching The Express a few weeks ago on a flight back from NYC, which happened to also be the most turbulent flight I've ever had. Overhead bins were popping open, the drink cart never made an appearance, and the only distraction I had from this impending death was a movie about the first black man to ever win the Heisman Trophy, and all the discrimination he faced on his journey there. Like my grandfather would have said, I was "sweating like a whore in church."

Gran Torino is a film that addresses racism in a much different kind of way. Though movies such as The Express are based on a true story, and should therefore be more authentic than a fictional tale, Gran Torino spotlights a reality that many of us do not know exists.

Though they are respectable films, movies like The Express and Remember the Titans lead us astray. They teach us that racism is a thing of the past for the most part, and because of these small groups of people who overcame their differences and emerged in an otherwise despicable time, things are forever changed. But what they don't show us is that these success stories are a small percentage of what has happened in American culture. Though we have made progress, there is a much more intricate problem now than what used to be black vs. white.

Gran Torino addresses this in a way that can not be denied. Racial slurs beyond the sphere of anything a moviegoer has ever heard in a movie makes up most of the script - and in some ways, adds comedic appeal to the text. We Americans are taught to believe that those who are outwardly racist these days are obviously just ignorant, naive, and undereducated. That makes it easier to write off, doesn't it? Gran Torino doesn't take this easy out. It shows us that a perfectly respectable American man, who had a loving wife, a cute dog, and a gorgeous house, has deeply ingrained prejudice. He is not ignorant, naive, or undereducated. - he's your grandpa.

After making its point, Gran Torino takes the important step of showing the difficulties of how the Hmong community (which I feel is a representation of multiple other sub-communities of all ethnicities) fits into a typical American suburb. The relationship between this community and our racist, yet otherwise lovable protagonist is the plot line that leads to this film's message that a person's prejudices never fully erase from their mind, the person just chooses to stop being outward about their discrimination. I guess that's what they call tolerance?

I have definitely filed Gran Tornio under movies that you need to see in order to get a big ass reality check. In that same category is Requiem for a Dream. You may not feel fantastic after watching these movies, but that's the point. As Maroon 5 sings, "it's not always rainbows and butterflies." Take advantage of a film that doesn't take you on a trip through la-la land. It makes dealing with the real shit in your life thismuch easier.

Friends in Low Places

2009-03-18T17:42:00.004-06:00

Something embarrassing about myself that I try to not openly admit (besides the fact that I drool in my sleep) is that I watch American Idol. In my defense, I haven't been watching this season... until last night. My good friend Tru Love has been keeping me updated on what has been happening this season, and I didn't feel the need to tune in. Last night, I turned on the TV, AI was on, and the rest is about to be posted in this blog.

If you are not an AI fan - lucky you - you probably don't know that each week AI chooses a theme for the week's songs. I think this is done in an effort to weed out the contestants who can only sing one genre of music. Probably a good idea. Anyhow, last night's AI theme was country music. Country week is always a good indicator of who the people are with real talent. Though I used to hate country music, living in Texas made me appreciate it. And by "made me appreciate it," I mean "I decided to stop being cranky at the bar so I had to learn to like country music if I wanted to have fun, like, ever."

As I watched AI last night, pretty much every contestant suffered through a horribly butchered and putrid version of a respectable country song. One douchebag even did an Egyptian-inspired raping of "Ring of Fire." You don't even want to know what that sounded like...

The performances weren't awful because the people can't sing - obviously, if they have made it this far in AI, they can sing. What was missing from the performances was something else, something beyond musical technicalities.

So this morning I was thinking about it more as I drove to work. I realized that as a genre, country music appeals to those of us who have some kind of haunted past, broken heart, drinking problem, etc. This isn't news to anyone I know, but I had never thought of it as the reason why so many artists simply can't perform country songs. Unlike other genres that just require talent to succeed, country requires an emotional queue that is authentic and far-reaching.

What I love about country music is the pain you can hear in the artist's voice. I love that only a small percentage of professional musicians can participate in this genre. I love that the lyrics in this genre apply to the "every man" and not just bitches and hos. Even though I can relate to that sometimes, too. Country music isn't liked by everyone, and it's easy to see why. It's a rhetoric that makes you feel better and worse all at the same time. It reminds you of the lowest times in your life, and the people who were there with you. I fell in love with this genre at a time in my life that I was falling apart. I think that is fairly common with most people who become fans of country music.

I guess those little American Idol bitches are always terrible during country week because they might have the chops to sing a song, but unlike some of us, they don't have friends in low places.

Good news!!

2009-03-16T22:20:00.000-06:00

I updated my Netflix queue for the first time in months and I will actually be seeing some movies. That means I will have something to blog about! Yay!

The Notebook

2008-08-19T18:24:00.005-06:00

The Notebook.

It's one of my favorite movies, but there are some things about it that bother me. For one, the title. I don't think the actual notebook in the movie is really that much of a focal point to warrant the film being named after it. Sure, a notebook is where the story is technically being read from, but I think the more appropriate title for the movie would have been "Love is a Mofo."

Before I get into the plot and all of that, I have to say that the Notebook really is a good movie. It is an intricate text that goes, for lack of a better term, by the book. Excellent character development is what really makes it stand out. Even secondary characters, such Joan Allen's character, show development that is relevant and contribute toward the text. So many movies overlook character development, so when I find a movie that develops all of its characters, it makes me so very happy.

The Notebook is a movie about constantly trying to get the person you love back. I think the true focus is on Ryan Gosling's character, Noah, always chasing after Rachel McAdams' character, Allie. From the beginning of the movie to the end, he is chasing her. At first, he is trying to just get a date with her. Next, he is trying to get her back after they break up. Then, he is trying to steal her from another man. And finally, he is trying to save her from Alzheimer's. He spends his whole life chasing her. Through his chase, the audience empathizes with him. Who hasn't chased someone they love? We relate to the chase. We relate to Allie having to choose between two men. We relate to her parents hating Noah. We relate to Noah and Allie's fighting. We relate to the struggle to be happy when you don't have the person that you love. We relate to all of it.

So what makes this movie so heart-wrenching? If we relate to all of these things, why do you feel like a giant piece of shit after watching it? My theory is that there is one thing in this movie that most of us absolutely cannot relate to. And that is having the person you love the most come back to you wholeheartedly. Watching this happen in a movie is just a reminder that life doesn't work out like this.

AS IF that wasn't enough, the movie goes on to show us that even if you are one of the lucky few to have the love of your life show back up on your doorstep, you still end up losing them eventually. You grow old and... you die. And you'll probably get Alzheimer's or something of the like before you die. No matter what happens, if you get the one you love or if you don't, you still end up losing them.

And this is why the move should have been named "Love is a Mofo."

_____________________________________________________________________

And just as I finished writing this post, I popped over to perezhilton.com and was greeted by this wonderful story. I hope they realize they are just going to end up with Alzheimer's, dying in a nursing home. Or something.

Sources reveal exclusively to PerezHilton.com that The Notebook co-stars and former real-life lovers Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams are "definitely together again.

Insiders tell us that the loved up couple, both Canadian, are currently in Toronto together and "very happy."

Yay!!!

Premonition

2008-08-13T22:34:00.003-06:00

Tonight Andie and I were sitting watching TV when she noticed two parked police cars outside of our house. Because both of us are paranoid, generally unlucky, and because and I have outstanding speeding tickets in Texas, we were convinced that the cops were coming to get us. For about forty-five minutes we kept looking outside to see where the cops where or to catch a glimpse of what was going on. Everything on the street was quiet. I looked far down the street and saw four men walking our way. As they came closer into the light of our house, I could see that two of them were cops, one of them was a priest, and one of them was a coroner. Someone down our street had just been notified that a loved one was dead.

I can't imagine what it would be like to open my front door to that group of men, but I hope I never have to. Living in Killeen with a deployed spouse taught me to hate the sound of my own doorbell, for fear it was a casualty notification officer and chaplain on my front step. Some of us fear the sound of our phone ringing in the middle of the night, frantically answering it asking "is everything ok??" When a friend or family member is an hour late coming home, we convince ourselves they were in a fatal car accident. We assume the worst in situations like this and embed fear into our lives when statistically, we have no reason to. How is it that we have become so paranoid?

Movies, baby.

Movies make us believe. Mostly in love, but in other things too. After I saw Premonition, I was every day convinced that someone I knew would die in a terribly fiery car accident. I only hoped that I, like Sandra Bullock, would be able to psychically witness the event a week before it took place (or was it a year? The movie gets confusing...), and make everything right between me and the about-to-be deceased. Premonition plays on the fear of that dreadful visit from a police officer, notifying you that your husband is dead. It's a very choppy text that really has no congruence when you put it all together, but as I have come to find out, congruence means very little in the whole scheme of a film.

The film goes off into a Butterfly Effect sort of tangent, switching back and forth from past to present to future. This, of course, is what makes the text suspenseful and entertaining. Underneath it all, Premonition is a movie that, in a very simple way, reminds its audience that shit happens and to make sure you have your shit together when said shit does in fact happen. Because in real life, you don't get to bounce back and forth between the past and the present. In real life, two cops, a priest, and a coroner will go walking down your street to break the news on someone's door step, and all they have is right now to deal with it.

That's the annoying thing about movies. They do so much to make us paranoid for these terrible things to happen, but when the terrible things actually happen, what are we left with? Zilch. If anything, I feel like movies give a rhetorical "that sucks" to all of us. They, pardon the pun, reel us in, then leave us out to dry when this shit actually happens.

Such is life. Just not life in movies, of course.

The Dark Knight

2008-08-07T22:09:00.003-06:00

Finally, I got to see it. It was so worth the wait.

I don't know how much Heath Ledger's death made the hype of this film grow, but I guess we will never know that. I will say that watching it, knowing that Ledger is no longer alive, did make the whole thing even more creepy that it already is.

I was never into Batman movies of the past. Batman Forever and Batman Returns were really just cheesy super-hero flicks that had no rhetorical purpose whatsoever. Batman Begins changed all of that and that spawned The Dark Knight. Together, Batman Begins and The Dark Knight have created a unique spot in film and rhetoric that I am Loving with a capital "L."

Batman Begins showed us how and why Bruce Wayne became Batman. Unlike other superheroes, Batman was not born with any special powers. He was a normal person who let fear overtake his life. Watching his city crumble around him, he embraced his fear to become stronger - to become a fighter. I liked Batman Begins because it persuaded its audience that fear should be a catalyst for something better in your life than being afraid. It was a movie with a dark plot and a dark screenplay. Even the cinematography was dark. So many people were pleasantly surprised with Batman Begins (myself included), it only made sense to carry on with the same theme.

The Dark Knight picks up right were Batman Begins left off. Gotham City is now being terrorized by the Joker. One of the first and most memorable quotes in the Dark Knight that we hear again later on is "Either you die a hero or live long enough to become a villian." I was impressed with the cynicism this one line had to offer.

As the movie progresses, we see more of the Joker, more of Batman, and more of Harvey Dent. Dent is the new District Attorney in Gotham City that is bringing people to justice the right way. Batman/Bruce Wayne is all about Dent because he is helping rebuild Gotham through justice, not through vigilante tactics. Batman tries to protect him, but as we see, even people with the best of intentions at one point survive so many terrible things in their life, they turn to the dark side. This is what happened to the Joker. It happened to Harvey Dent. It can happen to anyone. If you don't die a hero, you live long enough to become a villain.

As I have said before in other blogs, movies tend to shy away from being so cynical and blunt. They allow for a little cynicism at the beginning but force a resolution at the end that is unrealistic. But we like it because it makes us feel better about life. The Dark Knight doesn't do this. While other movies are telling us that what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, The Dark Knight tells us that what doesn't kill us only makes us more evil.

I love that film is becoming more dynamic and a text like the Dark Knight is so widely acclaimed and appreciated. Maybe so many people are caught up in Heath Ledger's death that they are overlooking what the movie is telling us. I see an interesting message that could be compared to the United States' current Iraq debacle. The Joker is a crazy person who really isn't scared of anything. He has seen it all, he isn't afraid to die. So how do you fight someone who isn't scared of you?

Hmmm, doesn't that sound like the same characteristics of, oh I don't know, the Iraqis who do not want US involvement? They are suicide bombers, after all. They've fought a civil war their entire existence. They've seen it all and a little pressure from the US isn't going to make them flinch. Much like the Joker. Why so serious, Iraq?

The Joker is challenged by many people in the movie. Almost all of them either end up dead or more evil and villainous than they were before their encounter with trying to beat the Joker. So what does this imply about the U.S. and our involvement in Iraq? We are either going to end up dead, or more evil and villainous than we were before.

The only complaint I have about the movie is that Batman's voice sounds like Satan on the verge of sneezing. A little over the top on that. But, if that is the worst thing I can find in a movie, I say that is $9.75 well spent... of my friends' money.

Still trying...

2008-07-29T19:37:00.001-06:00

I can't find anyone to go see the Dark Knight with me. So... I'm kind of at a halt right now. I have a blog about Batman Begins, but I wanted to post it in conjunction with the Dark Knight blog.

I may be going to see it by myself. *sniff*

Georgia Rule

2008-07-23T16:48:00.003-06:00

If you are wanting to watch a movie that can't figure out its own plot, its own characters, and its own message, watch Georiga Rule.

I'm not saying that it's a terrible movie. It's not. When I saw previews for it before it was in theaters, it was marketed as a light-hearted comedy/coming of age tale. So, I never saw it. It got terrible reviews and Lindsay Lohan stars in it, so I didn't think I was missing out on much. Let's all face it, we haven't liked any movie that Lohan has been in since Mean Girls. Georgia Rule is not a movie typical of any genre, and even after watching it a couple of times, I can't figure out what this movie is trying to be.

What movie watchers like to see is character development and some type of plot resolution. Every time Georgia Rule appears to be going in this direction, the characters regress to a former version leaving the audience to wonder what is happening and what the truth of the plot is. It's frustrating and disjointed. The storyline is beyond weird. An alcoholic mom, a hardass grandmother, a teenage girl who either was molested by stepdad or seduced him - the truth on that one is never completely clarified, a teenage guy that is suddenly in love with Lohan, and an uncomfortable male role-model character played by Dermot Mulroney that just makes things worse. Sounds like a trainwreck, no?

Well, kind of. What I like about this movie is the reality of the character progression and regression. Movies sometimes frustrate me because they don't show the challenge that real people face in becoming a better person. Most movies allow their protagonists to have one major downfall, which they overcome triumphantly. I can't even figure out who the protagonist in this movie is. That's beside the point. I enjoy that, whether this movie meant to or not, it doesn't allow its characters to progress into a perfect person. Its characters try, fail, try, fail all the way up until the credits roll. Maybe it was poor screenplay writing, but I kind of like it. Real life doesn't let us progress into a perfect person. We try and fail, try and fail our whole lives.

I'm disappointed that a Lindsay Lohan movie was innovative enough to do this, and movies with more respectable actors haven't done so that much. So, I'm just going to assume that it was a mistake.

Coming up

2008-07-21T16:52:00.004-06:00

I keep going back and forth on whether or not I should see Stop Loss. I will see it one day. I don't think I have Killeen out of my system enough to be able to critique it as a normal person would right now. And by "normal person" I mean, "someone who hasn't been exposed to, and ruined by, the Army for the past 5 years."

Meanwhile, I will be seeing the Dark Knight this week and can't wait to write about it! I've heard many good things.

I'm working on posting my Fight Club thesis on here, too. So when you have time to read 20 pages of my thoughts you will be able to.

Hancock

2008-07-17T14:00:00.003-06:00

This summer has been a different one as far as movies go for me. Films I thought I had figured out from the get-go turned out to be something I didn't expect. In some cases, this was great (Iron Man), in other cases, I wanted to gouge my eyes out for having had to watch the crapiness unfold (The Happening). Falling into the former category is Hancock.

I will admit, I am pretty leery of most Will Smith movies. Which is sad because I adored him as the Fresh Prince. His film choices don't appeal to me because I don't like sci-fi/action/comedy concoctions that usually have something to do with aliens/robots. That is Will Smith's abridged resume. I was worried that Hancock would fall into this genre and though it did in some ways, it also provided a unique storyline that triumphed past its superhero facade.

Hancock's message to the audience is that no matter how much two people are drawn to one another, it does not mean that they belong together. It's an unexpected message that transcends a shallow action plot. It even goes as far to imply that people who have it all are held back because of their desire to be with "their other half." With typical (but enjoyable) Will Smith humor, Jason Bateman (when did this guy become so popular in movies?), and a little bit of a plot twist, I look past the anti-climactic ending and appreciate the unique statements the screenplay makes.

Will Smith, make more movies like this. And Hitch. I liked Hitch a lot, too.

The Break-Up

2008-07-13T21:39:00.004-06:00

If you had asked me two years ago what I thought of the movie The Break-Up, I would have given you an ear-full about what I disliked about it. Generally, I am the type of movie watcher who likes to see a happy ending. If there is no happy ending, I like to see one hell of a good twist. The Break-Up gives neither. I bought the movie on DVD before even watching it, assuming that since Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau were in it, I would like it. I watched it and was immediately disappointed that the movie ended with a break-up... and nothing else. Though the title should have prepared me for the end, I was disappointed when the ending did not resolve the relationship. I vowed to never watch it again.

So here I am tonight, flipping through the channels on my big-ass plasma TV, and The Break-Up is on HBO. It was toward the end, so I figured that would not break my vow of "never watching it again." I wasn't watching it in its entirety = technicality. The last few minutes that I did catch completely changed my opinion on the film. I guess my current life situation also played a part in my epiphany, but I saw a message in this movie that I never have before. Message: sometimes things just don't work out.

Perhaps it's because I am a fan of movies such as the Notebook, which preach that no matter what obstacles come about (differing social classes, distance, hot and wealthy fiances who ride on horseback), love in movies always prevails. And since movies influence how we anticipate our real lives to be, we assume that love in the real world will always prevail, too. Maybe that's why break-ups hurt so much. Not because we are sad about losing the person, but because we are sad that - once again - love didn't pan out. I didn't like The Break-Up when I first saw it because love didn't prevail. The two characters went their separate ways, and the resolution of the movie is that one day in the future, they run into each other and have an amicable exchange. I hated that two years ago. Now, I appreciate the honesty of it. Relationships fail for reasons beyond our reach. The Break-Up shows this and in addition, tells its audience that even though this part of our life ends, one day you will realize it was the right thing to do and be ok with it.

Happy endings rarely happen in life, that's why I like movies to have them. After re-watching The Break-Up, I have re-evaluated what my definition of "happy ending" is.

In some cases, a break-up is the happy ending.

What Women Want

2008-07-13T00:00:00.000-06:00

The great thing about cable TV (mostly TBS and TNT) is the array of random movies from the past 10 years that are run over and over again. Including, but not limited to: A Few Good Men, The Shawshank Redemption, Jerry Maguire, and my personal favorite, What Women Want. I admit that every time one of these movies, or one of its equally as mediocre counterparts, is on TV, I will watch it. I like watching the same movies over and over again because one day, I know that something about it will click with me. Tonight, it was What Women Want.

When this movie first came out in 2000, Mel Gibson had not yet ventured into his public bigotry and Helen Hunt was, for whatever reason, a really popular actor. While watching this movie tonight, for probably the 20th time, I noticed that I really hate the whole meaning of the movie. I have to agree with a lot of the plot, but I hate the overall message. I have to agree with parts of the plot in the sense that women do have a lot of crazy shit on their minds that we keep to ourselves. We are not outward in most of our emotions/thoughts/fears, but that is because we can't be. I think the movie and I agree on this. We start to differ when the presence of a male character paying attention to the thoughts and needs of a woman all of a sudden makes everything harmonic. Wouldn't it be great if we all just needed someone to pay a little attention to our thoughts to make everything better? It's not that simple, Mel Gibson, you crazy anti-semitic bastard.

Maybe back in the day all women needed was someone to listen and give some attention. But nowadays, it's going to take a lot more than a dude who can read minds to fix all the women in the world. This movie makes me realize that men think women are all damsels in distress, needing someone to save us, and that is what pisses me off. We aren't damsels, though we are certainly distressed. We don't need men to save us - we can save ourselves. Trust me, we can.

So, then, what is it that women want? I can't even answer that, I don't know why Paramount Pictures tried to.

The Happening

2008-07-12T23:42:00.000-06:00

Dear M. Night Shyamalan,

I'm sorry it had to end this way.

I remember how I felt after watching the Sixth Sense. I admired your ingenuous plot twists and spine-tingling caveats in the screenplay. In fact, I caught the Sixth Sense on HBO a few days ago and was still affected by it. That same feeling was revived after Unbreakable. Even more so after Signs. I really thought we had something.

Then the Village came out.

It was hard to ignore the fact that this movie was, in every way, a huge piece of shit. I even listened to a (fantastic) speech by a college classmate condemning it as the worst movie ever made, and you, as the worst director on earth. It was a horrendous movie, but hey, at least it had a twist. I was excited when I heard you had a new movie coming out called the Happening. I was even more excited when I found out none other than Marky Mark would be starring in it. I thought this would be the exact thing we needed to get our movie-maker/movie watcher relationship back on track. I hoped we could put that whole Village debacle behind us and move on to something like the good old days, something reminiscent of "I see dead people" and what have you.

Well, M. Night (or whatever people call you), I saw the Happening today, and here's what "happened:"

- I spent $7

- I wasted 2 hours of my life

- I lost thismuch respect for Marky Mark for even being in this piece of shit movie, but luckily he's hot enough to make that not a big deal

- I watched a movie with absolutely no plot, character development, or redeeming quality in any possible sense

I see what you were trying to do. You were trying to tell us silly humans to be nicer to the earth. WOW! Thanks for the message. None of us had any idea that the environment is being harmed. Thankfully we have you to educate us about the shit that everyone already knows. Perhaps you could make a movie about this little place called "Iraq" and how one day a civil war might erupt there. Or, better yet, how about you make a movie called, "Gas prices are going to get really high, y'all." If you were simply trying to give moviegoers a subtle message about our effect on the environment, here's a little piece of advice… moviegoers want to be entertained, not given an unneeded social commentary on something we all already fucking knew. And if you are deadest on doing that (a la the Village) at least throw us a twist or something.

By the way, I just checked out Wikipedia (that shit don't lie) and found out that you spent $57 million to make this movie. $57 million. What else could you have spent that on? If you were so concerned about the earth retaliating against humans enough to make the worst movie ever, maybe you could have taken that $57 million to plant a damn tree. But, wait, that tree would probably end up killing you, wouldn't it? Sorry for the pun, but in this case, I would have to root for the tree.

Disgustfully yours,

Christine Voss